Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Oct Awareness Month!!

Its October... fall is here, weather is cooling off, scarecrows and pumpkins are out, soups and hot chocolate seem more enticing, boots and long sleeves are coming out... BUT did you know that October is also "awareness month" for a few different causes that touch so many lives?

That's right! Its Breast Cancer, Down Syndrome, and Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month!

All causes are equally important, touching and affecting so many lives. You don't realize how needed raising awareness for a cause is until one of the reasons for the cause hits home. The cause that affects me personally is Pregnancy & Infant Loss. If you know me personally or have read my story on here then you know why! Gracen caused my knowledge of that specific cause to surface just last year. Honestly, I didn't even know it was so much out there for the cause till I was in the women's hospital and saw things about it because of all months that we lost our baby, it  was October! 
Needless to say, this month is now very hard for us...

To honor our baby, the three of us (my husband, son, and I) are participating in a "Walk to Remember" in a few weeks. Also, the candle remembrance day will be on my calendar and you will smell the warm fall scents all through the house on Oct 15th!  Please join me that evening in lighting a candle to remember those babies lost. I pray for peace, comfort, and understanding if you have personally experienced the loss of child. Its hard, no matter what stage/age of life your baby was. Remember, there are others out there experiencing the same things and through causes/awareness/etc we can come together and support/encourage each other! I know friends, family, and now people who have reached out since I experienced our loss that have gone through the same thing. It happens more than you ever would have realized.

If you think you are experiencing a miscarriage, please contact your Doctor.. 
"Miscarriage is the most common type of pregnancy loss, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). Studies reveal that anywhere from 10-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies will end in miscarriage. Chemical pregnancies may account for 50-75% of all miscarriages. This occurs when a pregnancy is lost shortly after implantation, resulting in bleeding that occurs around the time of her expected period. The woman may not realize that she conceived when she experiences a chemical pregnancy. " via APA website at link below.
Visit the American Pregnancy Association for more details.

I also personally know people affected by the other causes for the month. If you haven't read my friend and past co-workers story of her precious Mary Martin (Down Syndrome Awareness) and the impact God has let her short little life be to the world, click HERE.

Please visit links to see more about each one.  There are many sites out there!


Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness

Ecclesiastes 7:14 says,
"When  life is good, enjoy it. But when life is hard, remember; God gives good times and hard times, and no one knows what tomorrow will bring."

Romans 8:18 says,
 "I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."

Happy 1st Heavenly Birthday, Gracen!

Today marks one year since we lost a precious part of our family... Gracen, our second child. IF you haven't read my "Gracen" post before, I suggest you stop, scroll down, read, and come back!!

Gracen Hoshell Oct 2nd 2011 
It doesn't seem like a year since I experienced one of the hardest days of my life. No parent wants to think about loosing a child, no matter their age, much less experience it first hand. When it happens to you there's a moment you get stuck in, a mere sense of shock, a sudden emptiness you never knew.On the other hand we held it together better than Chris or I ever thought we would.  Having Christ in our lives, the center of it all, having a plan and reason for taking our baby so soon makes it easier to grasp. Not that we didn't hurt, cry, or have questions as to what the reason was. Just knowing children are important to God and He took our baby back home we had a sense of peace. How can you not be "happy" that a child you already loved was already spending eternity with God? I mean isn't that where we all should long to be for ourselves and for everyone on earth? Gracen just gets a head start over us! We will see his/her face one day and be a complete family again... for eternity! That's something we won't get to do here, time here is temporary, so would I rather have our baby for a short time on earth or forever in Heaven? I choose the latter. I would have loved to have had two children back in May, hold my baby, hear the cries, change more diapers, sing to him/her but God knows best! I can't question it, I just have to trust in it. Priorities change, faith grows even stronger, family is tighter, and love is deeper when something like that happens to you! I still think about Gracen a lot. I pray for more children and continued peace/strength to cope with the loss.  No matter how bad it hurts, the pieces you don't see in the completed puzzle of your life, and the milestones you missed are nothing compared to what God has in store.  He had a plan for taking Gracen. I may not ever know exactly why this side of Heaven, but I know my baby is in a far better place and experiencing far greater joy than s/he would ever have here.

To celebrate Gracen's short life and the impact its had on our life this past year we did something special today!
First, to keep my mind from dwelling on the date, I went out shopping with Mom and Aiden today. Aiden got new fish to add to this tank and we spent some nice time with Mom, much needed adult chats, etc. Such a good day! When Chris got home, he gave me the Willow Tree figurine (Remembrance) I had mentioned getting on the one yr anniversary to add to our collection! We had planned on doing something special and both prepared  verses to read. The three of us went outside to the cross we had put up May 14th (Gracen's due date) in the back yard as a memorial and sang "Happy Birthday" then Aiden wanted some "cake" so that we did. I had bought cupcakes in blue and pink (since we don't know the sex of Gracen) for today and a balloon with "happy birthday" on it where I wrote an added note "Gracen 10.2.11" that we released to Heaven!! We then had a time of prayer and read our verses. I had written a letter this afternoon to Gracen and read it out loud tonight... that was HARD but it was so comforting to say! Aiden sat so quietly eating his cupcake and smiling when we'd finish scripture. He finished us off with his verse of Jeremiah 29:11 (yes, he can quote it by himself). Some verses we read are below in case you want to dig into your Bible! Aiden kept saying, "Gave the balloon to Gracen in Heaven!" When we finished, Chris said "We're going inside to eat, say goodnight to Gracen." Aiden looks in the sky with such a serious face and says, "Goodnight Baby Gracen!" He is so sweet and says some of the most mature things. We don't talk about it a lot around him b/c we thought he was too young to grasp what happened, but he some how knows more than we've said to him! Its one of those things you feel God sends those little comfort messages to you through him. He told me one day when I asked him if he knew baby Gracen was his baby brother or sister in Heaven, after nodding "yes" replied "Baby Gracen got hurt and lives with Jesus." Really? Wow!! There's been other things too but I will keep those more private as we feel those are Gods messages of comfort to us...

 Our family by the memorial cross tonight!
 Memorial Cross, Balloon, and Cupcakes!
 Happy Birthday Balloon Release!
Aiden enjoying birthday cupcakes! lol
 Verse and Remembrance Willow Tree

Job 1:20-21
Proverbs 3:5-6
Psalm 137:13-16
Psalm 127:3
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Romans 8:28
Romans 12:12
Jeremiah 29:11
 
"God Grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference! "

"  Steady my Heart" by Kari Jobe via YouTube



Gracen, our angel in Heaven. God shed His grace on us! A tiny life lost so soon yet loved the same! We'll see you one day!
Happy 1st Heavenly Birthday!! ... Love Mommy, Daddy, and big brother